"I'm a bartender, I do great things."

I'm not one to hate on MTV because I actually like it.  But, they've gone too far.  These overly tanned, juiceheads we now call "Guidos" and "Guidettes" have graced our lives on MTV's Jersey Shore.  What's worse is now these kids actually believe they're famous.  Plus, they all want fucking spinoff shows. Someday Harvard students will be writing thesis papers on how media can glorify sub-cultures so much that it's considered acceptable.  What's even better is how they all give THEMSELVES a nickname.  Last time I checked, nicknames are GIVEN to you!  Most of the girls are so orange and dress like it's 1997.  Black hair dye must be hard to come by in Jersey since nearly every Guidette has jet black,poofed up hair.  Snooki (the one who got punched by a man) takes full responsibilty for the creation of "The Poof."  Most normal gals tease their bangs a little but no...not Snooki.  She aquires a NYC sized rat and hides in in her hair.  The most troubeling thing is the infamous "Fist Pump" they all do.  Their form of dancing has turned into a full on "battle", as they've called it.  Whatever happend to simply grinding on your dance partner?  Now, they have to start pounding the floor then act as if they're practicing tribal like dancing.  However, I am dumb founded by the whole living situation.  Not to be confused with Mike"The Situation."  They all act as if they have been forced to live in this gaudy beach house.  Calling and crying to their boyfriend or mommas that they are homesick.  Then, GO HOME!