Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Obviously the Gift that keeps on Giving

You know when you buy your sister a really cute necklace because you know you will get some use out of it too?  Well, this is pretty much the same, only apply it to men.  Now, boyfriends and husbands of the world have a way to help tone and sculpt their ladies forearms and biceps.  But, it seems there may also be a beneficial factor in it for the guys as well.  Fast foward to the 40 second mark to see how they explain "Dynamic Inertia."  Although I'm pretty sure the rest of the world calls is something else.

Friday, October 23, 2009

Hey, Mr. Carter!

Dwayne Michael Carter, Jr has pleaded guilty to attempted possession of a weapon.  Rolling Stone reports Wayne had a .40 caliber handgun on his tour bus when the NYPD hopped on board and discovered it this summer.  Weezy happens to be facing the exact same charge in Arizona, only throw in some marijuana,coke, and a little bit of good old ecstacy.  Hopefully Lil Wayne can share a cell with T.I. who happpens to be serving time for a weapon charge as well.  Dibs on top bunk!  What will we do if the industry must undergo an entire year without Weezy f. Baby?  Who would impregnate the nation's female population?  So far, he has fathered four children...two of them being conceived and or born this year.  There are probably many more single ladies lucky enough to have received his seed that have yet to come out.  Hopefully he won't have to endure the same agonizing sentences like that of Paris Hilton or Khloe Kardashian Odom.  At least he's the greatest rapper alive.

Sunday, October 18, 2009


Levi Johnston is still burning up his 15 minutes of fame!  Turns out there happens to be a few more perks to knocking up the Governor of Alaska/Almost President's daughter.  Now, this kid even has commercials that are centered around him getting someone pregnant due to not using protection. Are you serious?  Well, as lame and low as it gets worse.  The commercial is for PISTACHIOS! enjoy.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

One of these things is a lot like the other

Hugh Hefner's latest additions to his mansion are just as blonde as the last girls...only two of them are barely legal. Hef has actually scored himself a pair of twins, the real kind too! Not ones that just act like it. Kristina and Karissa Shannon are two years over the legal age and aren't ashamed to show it. The two were even cast in a film by Sophia Coppola and yet they didn't know who she was. What's even funnier is that they believe their stay at the Playboy Mansion can extend as long as they want it to. Don't they know it's similar to a prison sentence? The usual stay is around three years which also requires scheduled playdates with Mr. Hefner. I find it hard to believe ANY of these girlfriends find him attractive. I'm sure they may grow to love him, but much like one would care for an old dog that humps your leg and nobody has the heart to put him down. The "#1 Girlfriend" as she's called, is Crystal Harris. I feel bad for Crystal since it seems she will be given the task of babysitting the Shannon twins...and Hef.

Friday, October 9, 2009

It's a Boy!

Kourtney Kardashian has graced the world with the knowledge of her baby's sex.  Boyfriend Scott Dusick knocked up the oldest Kardashian sister in the midst of her "Kourtney and Khloe take Miami" show.  Coincidence?        ...of course not! This had to be as unplanned as Khloe's suprise wedding to that one guy!  Kourtney quoted in her monotone voice, "I can't wait to buy all sort of boy's clothing."  Hopefully someone will tell her that means buying blue stuff.  Obviously the producers running the Kardashians' lives are genius.  Seems like the only sister left out of this charade is Kim.  I wonder what she will be dealt next? Since marriage and babies are already taken, the only logical step is some sort of substance abuse problem.  Who knows? 

Thursday, October 8, 2009

There's more Seed to be spread...

Levi Johnston has offcially agreed to pose for Playgirl. The only people who might care would be gay men with a soft spot for good ol' country boys. Or a governor's innocent daughter. I suppose which ever puts out first. If you're still trying to remember who this guy is...remember when Sarah Palin's daughter got really fat for nine months?  You can thank Levi for that.

Playgirl's readers may not fit the deer guttin' demographic that Levi does but perhaps he will sprouce it up a bit? Maybe wash the Wrangler or capture an elk with his bare hands!